“So, what the fuck did you bring me here for, then?” We were in bed and my back was to him.
“I don’t know . . . I thought you’d like to see Costa Rica, you know, have some fun.”
“I can come to Costa Rica anytime. I don’t need you for that.” He was a piece of shit, just like the rest. Maybe I was, too. I felt dirty. His eyes burned into the back of my head. “Just go to sleep,” I said. “You have to leave early.”
He was going on some kind of Argentina adventure. He probably had another girl there. He had a girl everywhere.
“Okay.” He cleared his throat. “Um…babe, I’ve been meaning to ask you…do you think you could take an empty suitcase home with you? My parents are coming to visit next month. I want them to bring back some of my stuff. I can have them come meet you in the city.”
“Fine. Anything else?”
He breathed. “Thanks . . . just . . . enjoy your last few days. You’ll have fun with Katya.”
I was a dog sitter and a mule now. A whore, a dog sitter and a mule.
He was gone early the next day. I roamed around with Katya in the heat. We walked the shore past tangled-haired surfers, and up gravel roads with engines ripping by. Everything looked different. Paradise was lost and so was I.
Friday came and my shuttle did, too. I handed Katya off to the property manager and piled in with the other passengers. They were all women, older women. They made small-talk the entire three-hour drive. I sank low in my seat.
“Where are you headed?”
“Mmm?” I pulled out my air pod. Her face was bright and round as a ball.
“Where you flying to?”
“Oh, Toronto.”
“That’s where I’m going!” Her smile was big and her teeth were yellow. We bounced around on the uneven road. “How did you like Nosara?”
“Good.” I forced a smile. “Was fun.” It wasn’t a total lie.
She didn’t get much more out of me. She finally gave up to chatter with someone else.
I exhaled as I cranked up my headphones.
It was hot as hell by the time we got to Liberia. I yanked my case from the back of the van then rolled it into the tiny airport. It seemed everyone was leaving Costa Rica the same day. I managed to find a spot in line. I was in a tight shirt and short shorts and my skin goose-bumped under the AC. My nipples stiffened. I wrapped my arms around them and looked around.
“You. Come here.” Three serious men approached.
“Me?”
“Step over here, please,” the biggest one said. His English was poor. I did what I was told.
“Your bag. Open it.”
I looked around. “Right here?”
He nodded at the floor. I lay my case on its side, then got on my knees.
“Is this yours?” he said.
“Yeah. Well, I have a suitcase packed inside another suitcase.” I had to crank my neck up to look at him. “The guy I was seeing asked me to bring this empty bag back to his parents,” I said. “Mine’s inside.” I glided the zipper around, then stood, heart skipping.
The dog sniffed, and the men rummaged. They tore the inner linings to shreds. I ran my hand back through my hair and looked around. People turkey-necked and watched from afar. The women from the shuttle stood frozen with wide eyes.
The big one dug through side pockets. He pulled out packets of tea, ripped them apart, then held them to the dog’s nose.
He gave up, threw them down and stood. He spoke angrily in Spanish to the other two, then turned to me. “You can go,” he said, and they marched off.
I exhaled, packed it all in, then wheeled back to the line through stares and whispers.
I made it through security, found my gate then looked around for something to kill the time. My phone dinged. I fished it out.
“Hope you have a good flight!” the message said. What a dick. I didn’t answer him.
Café Imperial, a glowing sign read. I hurried toward it.
“Green tea, please,” I said, resting a hand on the bar.
“Sorry, we don’t have tea. Just coffee.”
“Decaf?”
He shook his head. “Nope. Sorry.”
“Fine. Regular is fine.”
He turned to pour.
“Oh goodness! We didn’t think we’d see you again!” It was the round-faced lady from the shuttle, only a few inches from my face. “What happened?”
“No clue,” I gave a little laugh. “Guess I look guilty or something.”
“What were they looking for?”
The loud speaker crackled overhead: “Kari Janz, report to the help desk.” My stomach jumped. We both looked up. “Kari Janz…“
Our eyes met. “Is that you!?”
“Yeah.”
The bartender slid over my tea. “That’ll be $2.50,” he said.
I gave him a ten and a fake smile. I walked away, leaving the tea behind. What the fuck is in that bag? I thought. My palms were sweating. What’s lady jail like in South America? I scanned the busy terminal for the help desk.
“Ms. Janz?” He was a young guy, proper, in creased slacks and a pressed shirt.
“Yes.”
“Come with me.”
I did. “Can you tell me what’s going on?”
“There’s a problem with your bag. That’s all I know.” He took long strides. I had to double my pace to keep up. I followed him to the back, then down a long hall, then another. We pushed through a steel door and skipped down the steps. The sound of my flip flops echoed up the cement.
Another heavy door, and we entered a parking garage. It was quiet. No movement. My ass began to sweat in the heat.
“C’mon,” he said from the side of a box truck. “Behind here.”
My stomach fluttered and burned. I looked around. I could run, but to where? I wouldn’t get far.
We rounded the truck’s grill.
A row of army fatigues stood with long-guns and deadpan faces. The big one stared me down, and I stared back. My breath shook.
He nodded at my suitcase sitting on the back of an open truck. “It’s moving,” he said.
I glanced at it. “What?”
“Open it!”
I took steps toward it on wobbly feet. A wave crashed through me. Oh no. Please, no… Fuck. I squeezed my eyes tight. The bag was buzzing and I already knew. My hands vibrated and the zipper did, too.
I dug in and found it. I twisted the end to break the circuit, then all went silent and still. I turned back to them empty-handed.
“What is it?!” His eyes darted. “Show it to me!”
I shook my head slowly.
“Now!” He stepped forward.
I reached back in, gripped it with my fist, and pulled it out.
I turned with it, they stepped back, and I held the purple dildo high.
The big one’s face was red with fire. Someone let out a laugh, and I fought down the corners of my mouth.
“Get her out of here!” he barked then marched off.
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